Firstly, don't click your fingers
Ever wondered how to wow your waitress, it's pretty simple really:
1. If you've booked a table, and now have more (or less) people joining you, call the restaurant and let them know.
2. When it comes to the food, the waitress is the middleman (actually middle-woman) between you and the chef, don’t abuse the messenger! Explain to her why you don’t like it nicely and she can try and fix the situation from there.
3. If you are sitting against a wall furthest away from the waitress’s reach please help out and pass her your empty plate rather than sitting there watching her struggle.
4. You literally have one job all night, to order food and eat it! Please try to remember what you ordered. Meanwhile, the waitress is standing there yelling out a meal as the plate burns through her fingers.
5. Do not click your fingers at the waitress, you won’t be served any faster.
6. Do not demand the waitress take your order when both her hands are full with plates.
7. Do not argue with a waitress about specific procedures she has to follow. She does not own the business; it has nothing to do with her.
8. Forgive the waitress if your joke doesn’t get the reaction you were after, she has probably heard it many times before.
9. Unfortunately, your waitress does not have magical powers, if there are no tables available one will not magically appear even when you drop the owner's name.
10. Complaining as you’re leaving and pushing to get a discount after you ate the whole meal does not leave the waitress with too many options to make sure you leave the venue a happy customer.